Signage

I can't sleep, so I thought I'd resort to blogging. I cannot promise what follows will be either coherent or worth your time.

We returned this weekend from an 8-day stint in Sunriver, Oregon (yes, another road trip) for a reunion with Sean's family. We had a fun time and I have pictures to prove it, but since I'm sitting cozy in my bed and feeling far too lazy to drag my bones down them stairs to locate the camera, I'll have to upload and post pictures at a later date.

Which leaves me scrambling mentally for blog material. Here's what I've been mulling over for the past several days: signage.

I have seen some of the most random and bizarre signs recently. Being a sharer, I'm passing these scraps of literary genius on to you. Here goes.

1. Small print at the bottom of an enormous lottery sign on the freeway near Bend, OR:
"The Lottery should not be considered a viable financial investment"

My commentary: Seriously? Is this a necessary precaution? Who would consider the lottery to be anything more than the crap shoot that it is?

2. Petsmart posted notice for customers in search of meal worms to be used as food for reptiles.
"ALERT: There is currently a national shortage of meal worms. Please consult a Petsmart rep regarding alternative reptilian food sources."

My commentary: Again...seriously?! Is this news worthy of an ALERT in all caps printed on flourescent yellow paper? And what exactly is the cause of the national shortage of meal worms? Do we have an excessive population of pillaging reptiles that the government has kept hush-hush about? I smell a cover-up. Or is that leopard gecko dung???

3. A sign posted at a local pet boutique.
"Join us for 'Blessing of the Animals Day'...A variety of blessing ceremonies performed to honor our beloved animals..."

My commentary: It wasn't clear if these blessings were for the living or the dead. But for crying out loud. They're ANIMALS. Find something better to do with your time. (Although I must say I was kinda tempted to go. You could really have some fun with the crowd at this kind of a gig, eh?)

4. Back to Petsmart.
"Sale on Ferret Starter Kits"

My commentary: This piqued my curiosity and I went in for a closer look. Strangely the item turned out to be a cage containing food pellet containers and something akin to a gerbil-maze. I'm confused. Wouldn't a ferret starter kit contain simply a mommy ferret and a daddy ferret, with perhaps some mood music and cocktails???

Now that I have that on paper, my mind is at ease and I'm off to bed. Nite.